Dear Newbie:
Welcome to this wonderful new hobby/obsession. Let me save you the suspense and tell you how things will go. You’re going to read this blog and a few others. You’ll feel like an absolute spaz who doesn’t know anything. At first, you’ll be too scared to apply for all those credit cards. You’ll stall. You’ll make up excuses. You’ll read and read and read. Then, one day, you’ll build up the courage. Throwing caution to the wind…ignoring misinformation…you will apply for a couple of credit cards. Gulp! But things will actually go well. You’ll wonder why you didn’t do it years ago. The ability to travel without saving up weeks of paychecks will blow your mind. You’ll book a flight without paying for it, and you’ll be utterly and completely addicted.
Now you start getting comfortable. You start commenting a little on Flyertalk and blogs. You venture into prepaid cards. You start writing and speaking in abbreviations (keep in mind, this habit will get annoying to people around you). This is the nerdiness coming into your world. But, in all honesty, you’ve always been pretty nerdy…it’s just embraced more within this hobby. Then the day comes when you start making “friends” in this game. People tell you who all the “players” are, and how it’s important to mingle. This is something I must warn you about.
Currently, readers throughout the internet are getting spammed with information on Frequent Traveler University. This event involves “special guest lecturers” who are always the same 5 or 6 people. These shrewd businessmen disguised as dorks will teach you the secret ways of making unlimited miles. Of course, none of this is actually a secret. They’ll also skip the lesson explaining how much money they earn from credit cards links. See, this is all business. You are the customer. The majority of these bloggers sold out their content long ago so they could make a buck.
What about you, the innocent reader? Look again at what the subject of this post says. You, innocent reader, will now develop strange personality quirks. You will bash these bloggers at every turn, but the minute you get some interaction with them, you’ll shamelessly kiss their asses as if they were rock stars. You may have been a nerd before, but now you’ve become more of a weasel. You will actually be honored that an internet blogger, of all people, would take the time to speak to you.
Eventually, your behavior will disgust you. You’ll try to find an underground “pure” blog, but smaller bloggers only post sporadically. They don’t make any money and aren’t that motivated. In truth, they’re just wannabe shrewd businessmen. Now comes the moment when you give up. You realize that, in fact, everyone around you bites the big one.
Weeks pass. Then months. You keep earning your miles, but now it feels like a chore. Eventually the day comes, and you meet some nice people. By now, you’re too jaded to even notice. It’s at this exact moment it hits you. You remember reading this post. In a bitter twist of irony, you realize that you are now the one. The one who sucks.
